5. Figure It Out (Nickelodeon – off air)
—Ahh, Nickelodeon. The old Nickelodeon, none of this “new-era animation” that makes clay animation look like a godsend. The two personalities who stick out most in my mind are host Summer Sanders, and mainstay contestant Lori Beth Denberg. Oh Lori Beth…I think I speak for any kid who grew up in the mid to late 90’s that we miss you. Maybe “All That” could re-enter the world of television as well (not to mention eveyone’s favorite fast food restaurant movie “Good Burger”). The great thing about “Figure It Out” was not only the fantastic prizes offered (mountain bikes, stereo systems, SPACE CAMP), but the always anticipated slimings. Green goo poring from the ceiling onto some unsuspecting guest? Doesn’t get much better than that.
4. Jeopardy (CBS/GSN – on air)
—What kind of trivia list would be complete without the legendary Jeopardy? Thankfully the good people at GSN provide multiple doses of Trebek each day; my preference is the 1:00AM showing where I can’t quite yell at the screen, but still get upset when Wolf Blitzer confidently answers that Jesus’s birthplace was Jersusalem. C’mon Wolfy, I know it’s for charity, but you can do better than that. The mysterious appearing and vanishing of Trebek’s mustache is another highlight that always intrigues me. No-mustache brings me back to the younger days, while mustache-Trebek screams “Hooked On Phonics.” And who could forget the Jeopardy God himself, Ken Jennings? Please respect his authority:
3. Supermarket Sweep (PAX – off air)
—Groceries, food trivia, and old people racing through aisles to load up on today’s specials and looking for the all-mighty “bonuses”. Three of my favorite things. Someone needs to get in contact with PAX or UPN or some other seconds rate station and remind them of all the great things the Sweep offers. Three teams of pairs, generally husband and wife, face off to answer questions regarding the products located in the store. The Sweep also wins the award for Most Entertaining Finale, as it offers up some of the most hectic shopping in less than two minutes. Never have I seen three full-grown adults scuffle and shove to see how many honey baked hams they can fit in their carts (maximum of 5) until this. Extra points awarded for the teams that can get the ground coffee beans, candy, and bagels/donuts. All part of the pursuit to find a wad of $5,000 sitting behind the Planter’s Cashews. Well done. Plus (bonus knowledge), the shoddy excuse for a gameshow “Show Til You Drop” was generally aired after Supermarket Sweep. I don’t want to get all worked up over how such a terrible concept of a show can hold my attention for so long, so I won’t.
2. Cash Cab (Discovery Channel – on air)
—Ben Bailey: my favorite TV personality. Incredibly intelligent and funny show, I find myself rooting for the group of four old women on their way to a matinee and against the pompous pricks that seem to be way to good to play along with the game. Cash Cab is a true trivia show, in that there is no category per say, so the question genre is always mixed up. Bailey never ceases to amuse me with his array of accents and cultures he fronts to the contestants as they enter the cab. He can do anything from a whiny old guy to the infamous Brooklyn accent. Then of course, after the passangers’ destination is requested, off go the plaid lights. Some people freak out, some know what’s going on (“OH MY GOD, I LOVE THIS SHOW!”), and some just look irritated. Regardless, this show is a 10/10 for watching with interesting contestants. The good ones will always name 5 of the 7 Wonders of the World in 30 seconds, and will also go for the video bonus question at the end. You know what? All of the above information is irrelevant. This gameshow is happening in a moving vehicle. I think that’s enough said.
1. Stump the Schwab (ESPN – off the air)
—Being a huge sports buff, Stump the Schwab takes the cake. You know those guys that answer every question they hear on the TV or radio…or anywhere else, that has to do with sports? The Afflack Trivia question is “What was the record of the 1922-1923 New York Yankees?”, and they will jump off the coach to scream “101 wins and 61 losses!” Yeah, everyone knows at least one of those guys. Anyway, this show consists of three of them per show. Not to mention “The Schwab” who is an absolute guru. Seriously, there can’t, just CAN’T, be anyone else on this planet that knows more random sports trivia than this guy. Stuart Scott hosts, who will never run out of original ways to say to the exiting contestant “You’re not as good as you thought, get off my show.” I love watching The Schwab put these guys in their place. The lucky contestant that manages his way to the final round rarely out-knowledges The Schwab, who is quick to shake the losers hand. Which reminds me, this guy has to have the largest selection of pro jerseys known to man. Everything from the Polomalu jersey to Brett Hull, he has them all. Excellent gameshow; hugs and handpounds, everyone.
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